We are mighty
Because our team scored more points than the other lot
And we cheered (but cannot play to save our lives)
And yet, we are mighty.
We are important
We bought the thing important people are buying this year
And used it ineptly, wore it awkwardly
See ourselves getting ahead.
We are heard
Along with thousands of other people we phoned in
To choose the celebrity who will shortly be forgotten
We were heard, we mattered.
We are powerful
Because our country has expensive weapons no sane person would ever use
And is good at exploiting workers in distant lands
Behold our national identity.
We will vote
For the person we are told can actually win this
Because the key thing is to be seen backing a winning horse
Not what comes out of the horse’s mouth.
We are pleased with ourselves
Because we dare not think otherwise.
It’s all fine if you ignore the consequences
And we’re terribly good at doing that.